“Should we give him more time?” Dr. Franklin asks me and all I can do is shake my head, no. Nico Bianchi has let me down again. I don’t know why I keep giving him chance after chance because all he’s been is a no-show. Oh, he’s come to a couple of appointments but he seemed about as uninterested as a person could get. He tells me he loves me and that he wants this baby, but his actions prove otherwise. I know he’s still using whatever drugs he’s been taking and drinking all of the time. The multiple slutbags he’s been hanging out with doesn’t help either.
I guess it makes me glad that I had already stopped sleeping with him when his behavior turned more erratic. Who knows what type of STD’s he’s got. I was truly hoping that he’d change for us, but instead he’s gotten worse.
Today I’m finding to find out the sex of the baby. At my twenty week ultrasound the baby kept his or her legs crossed and wouldn’t show us and since I’m measuring big they want to do another ultrasound today.
“Okay since we’re not waiting let’s get started.” I lie back on the table and pull up my shirt. Dr. Franklin tucks a paper drape into the top of my jeans. She squirts some of that warm jelly onto my belly and grabs the wand thingy. “Let’s hope this little one cooperates with us today.” As soon as my baby’s image appears on the screen I feel the tears build in my eyes. I still can’t believe I have a little human growing inside of me. The doctor tells me everything that she sees and my heart swells knowing that my baby is looking good. “Oh my. This little one is finally working with us. It appears you’re having a little girl.”
I begin to cry happy tears. I’m having a little girl. My life will soon be dresses, baby dolls and shoes. “That’s great.” I whisper. My voice sounds hoarse from the tears I’m shedding.
After my checkup she lets me know that when I enter my eighth month next month that I will start coming in every two weeks. She tells me to continue normal activity for now, but if I have any tightening in my belly or begin to spot that I need to start slow .ing down. I tell her goodbye and stop at the front desk to schedule my next visit.
When I step outside I make my way to my car and climb inside. I blast the heat and try to warm myself up. While I wait I pull out my phone and send Nico a text.
Where were you? You missed ANOTHER appointment.
I pull out of the parking lot and decide to stop by Nico’s condo. I’ll show him the pictures and tell him what we’re having and he’ll probably act like he doesn’t care as usual. When I reach his condo I see another car sitting in the driveway and my stomach starts to turn. I get out and make my way to the front door. I knock and ring the bell but he doesn’t answer. I have a key, but normally I don’t use it. Well, today that changes. I’m tired of him hurting me over and over. I feel like I’ve become pathetic because I always forgive him. I always give him another chance.
I stick my key into the lock, turn it and then push open the door. The place is a mess. There are bottles everywhere. Vodka, Tequila and beer bottles litter the coffee table, the end tables and every other available space. I walk through the living room and make my way down the hall to his room. My stomach turns violently as I notice women’s clothing scattered all over the floor and ending at Nico’s door.